I'M SICK AND TIRED OF MY ANNOYING UNPREDICTABLE MS MOOD SWINGS

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Sway could mean different things with Multiple Sclerosis. One way could be about ones fucked up balance or their mood. Personally I am sick and tired of it. My mood swings are unpredictable and so god damn annoying. On the most part I am a happy and positive person. But when the ugly mood appears—I swear I am bi-polar!
              
When I’m having a good mood I am the nicest most positive individual. I am cool as shit. Fun to be around—Life of the party I must add. I enjoy spending countless hours researching all sorts of health information and health wellness to help others. It gives me great satisfaction knowing I have or maybe helping thousands of people. I work on my Facebook everyday looking for anyone that needs uplift. I make it part of my everyday routine to check on certain people. I try to acknowledge most people. I want them to feel that they are important. I want people to know they are in my thoughts everyday and that they mean a lot to me. With that being said, I become quite irritated when I don’t get it back.
              

When I was diagnosed with R/R MS, my parents didn’t get upset. The first reaction from them both was—“You didn’t get that from my side!”

When I was diagnosed with R/R MS, my parents didn’t get upset. The first reaction from them both was—“You didn’t get that from my side!” I was in a daze and didn’t really care what their reactions were. Nor did I care about my friends reactions. All I could do was focus on my own. 

I was devastated. I was scared, angry and very sad. I had a million things going through my head. For instance; would I die young? Am I going to see my children grow up? Will I see them get married and have children? There was so much on my plate that honestly a bomb could’ve gone off and I wouldn’t have cared. 

Presently, things have calmed down. I am a stronger woman because of this ugly disease.

MS and Antidepressants are two peas in a pod.

MS is not only a cause of depression, but the disease modifying drugs are as well. That is if one chooses to take them. Me, on hand prefers not to take the DMD's. I mean who wants to fuck up their livers by taking these drugs in the hope your disease--which is slow already--doesn't get worse. I don't. MS gives us enough shit to worry about.

But, I want to focus on one things today--depression. Depression and MS is a given. So most of us are forced to take an antidepressant. Myself--I have been battling depression for a long time and have tried several prescriptions. My current poison is Paxil. That's right I said poison. I have been doing great except one thing.

Angela Groves, Columnist, MSnewsChannel.com

I'M SICK AND TIRED OF MY ANNOYING UNPREDICTABLE  MS MOOD SWINGS

Sway could mean different things with Multiple Sclerosis. One way could be about ones fucked up balance or their mood. Personally I am sick and tired of it. My mood swings are unpredictable and so god damn annoying. On the most part I am a happy and positive person. But when the ugly mood appears—I swear I am bi-polar!
              
When I’m having a good mood I am the nicest most positive individual. I am cool as shit. Fun to be around—Life of the party I must add. I enjoy spending countless hours researching all sorts of health information and health wellness to help others. It gives me great satisfaction knowing I have or maybe helping thousands of people. I work on my Facebook everyday looking for anyone that needs uplift. I make it part of my everyday routine to check on certain people. I try to acknowledge most people. I want them to feel that they are important. I want people to know they are in my thoughts everyday and that they mean a lot to me. With that being said, I become quite irritated when I don’t get it back.
              
Everyone wants to feel loved and important. We do. We all do. Social networking has been a wonderful advocate in helping with that.  I understand not all have time—so they say—to always reply. My response to that would be—then get the fuck off the social network. Or at least write a post letting people know that you are on-line but for other purposes. Clarification is nice. Making others aware that you aren’t ignoring would be nice. I suppose in a perfect world. And this isn’t a perfect world. I wish.
             
I just wish people were more like me. Then everything would be okay. Ha! I am getting off track with my swaying mood. Oh how they sway! This way—that way. But, when it’s good—it’s damn good. When it’s bad, it’s sucks! My bad mood will come out of nowhere! Things or people can trigger it at any moment –anywhere. For me there have been times “the mood” punches me in the fucking face. I don’t even know why or how. All one or I can do is stay quiet and to oneself. In fact, I find it better that way. For this mood make one unpredictable. I fear with my short temper (because of my lesions on my fucking brain) that I could end up in an assault and battery situation. That’s why I feel it’s best that I stay home.
             
It sounds violent. I know. I just can’t help it. I think I can speak for most of us sick folks too. I do my best with what I got to stay sane, happy and positive. I’ve learned to just do what I want. Fuck what others think or want. Fuck what they say. Unless they are sick—they will never understand. It’s all about me. Not others and their opinions.
              
Life is short. Do what makes you comfortable. Do what makes you happy.

**Those that mind, don’t matter; those that matter, don’t mind**